Fatherhood according to Freud

I did some research a few years ago on the role of the father. Of course, I started with Freud, the so-called father of psychoanalysis, and this is what I found.

Freud believed the father:
☀ Has to step in and reinstate his place in the family fold before the child and mother duo of mutual adoration takes over the show. Freud’s Oedipus Complex rewrites the Greek myth of Oedipus – the story of the son killing dad to marry mum – instead Freud’s father is the victor.
☀ The father presents the child with a persistent threat of punishment (‘castration’) if they put a foot wrong.
☀The father is someone for the child to hate and project all their bad feelings onto. That way, the mother can remain the child’s fave.

Today, identifying fathers can:
☀ Offer and receive emotional support to and from their partner
☀ Set boundaries that help a child feel cared for and contained
☀Hold space for a child to process feelings and validate a child’s experience
☀Receive support from a professional to help them do the things above

Today I want fatherhood to move beyond gendered, heteronormative thinking. The role rigidity is done.

With the identifying fathers I work with, I share their hope for more flexibility, fluidity and agility in what it means to identify as a father, where they can play to their strengths and find a comfortable stretch in the new uncomfy stuff, rather than be coerced by socially constructed ideas that no longer serve.

It’s a confusing and disruptive time but it’s a promising time.

If you’d like to explore your role as a father, your experience of being fathered or of being fatherless, I have space for 3 new clients. Contact me via link in bio.


**References**
​​Freud, S. (1955). ‘Group Psychology and the Analysis of the Ego’ in J. Strachey (ed. and trans.), The Standard Edition of the Complete Works of Sigmund Freud, London: Hogarth Press, (1921).
Freud, S. (1961). ‘Female Sexuality’. In J. Strachey (ed. and trans.), The Standard Edition of the Complete Psychological Works of Sigmund Freud, London: Hogarth Press, (1931).